last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
he peed everywhere. it's like having a puppy.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
when I die covered in cocaine, hookers, and tequila at 73 years old just remember that I once had a tweet with that many retweets
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
Do you not realize that being Batman fulfills about 95% of my non-sexual fantasies?
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
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