hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
I CAN'T DO THIS MUCH FABULOUS BEFORE LUNCHTIME
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Randomize
