im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
He asked if I wanted to blow his flute? Please call me and pretend there is a family emergency!!!
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
