I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I just want to smoke weed and be the little spoon all winter. My modern day hibernation.
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
i’n just gonna forge ahead, gag reflex be DAMNED.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
Randomize
