So...i'm having a drinking contest, my right hand vs my left, i have a feeling the 24 pack is gonna win
Have fun at school today. Try to hide that you're a whore. The other girls will like you better that way.
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Plus my fingers were hella swollen from eating all these cured meats so it was like I was given it to her with Hulk Hands on
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
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