If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
then again I'm sitting on a tree stump completely naked in the dark listening to some type of glee soundtrack.
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Just woke up. Will be over soon. DON'T LEAVE THE CHAMPAGNE UNSUPERVISED.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Randomize
