i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
My mother walked into the bathroom at 345 am while I was splashing in the bathtub with the remnants of her birthday cake all over me... she looked at me and walked out...
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Oh my god I just remembered I bit a stripper last night.
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I JUST PETTED A FUCKING SQUIRREL. A SQUIRREL.
If you fuck her..... You will be in great danger. Like in so much danger it would be like walking into a pit of crocodiles who haven't eaten and you also just stole their baby.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
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