just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
A group of drunk Marines just serenaded me, never leaving this place
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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