Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
My professors need to stop cancelling class. Bad things happen when I have too much free time on my hands. Bad things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
He's like a fucking cake pop, the greatest thing in the world while it lasts, but it never lasts for long enough
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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