Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Woke up with a full plate of KFC next to my face. I didn't really question it.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
And at the semi-adult age of 25 I have shit my pants. Not even drunk, just really late to work. Is this real life?
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
and eventually we just all took our pants off
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