dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Had sex and ran 2.8 miles all before 7:30am. This is going to be a very productive Monday.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Give me one good reason why I should go with you.
Free beer.
..pick me up at 8.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize