I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
I found him. We're on the way back to the condo. He was sitting in the lifeguard stand letting people passing by take pictures of his nipples for a buck each..he made 15 dollars
I take back all of the insults I've ever said toward those money makers
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
Through a complicated series of events, I wound up in the desert with a blue chick from comic-con. we lost peter. if you're alive, please come get us.
Sunburned by dick at the nude beach. Bad. She tried to blow me. But. I. Just. Can't. Saddest day of my life.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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