Btw I've read that book you bought me...And I'm such a bitch now
But I don't think guys love me
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
Ack! That is the first dick pic I've ever received. A) congrats B) that is way grosser than I ever thought t would be.
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
My life is literally "I'm too horny you can't leave" or "let's have pie" there's like no inbetween
You sat on me. Like I was a toilet. While I was on the toilet. You peed a little.
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
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