Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
it took me 2 minutes to realize that it wasn't HER hand on my penis. First, and worst threesome ever..
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Im rolling a blunt of encouragement for you to return to
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
The creeper at the bar just realized we have the same birthday and bought me four beers already. He walked off so I took his change and dashed, i'm bringing the case over now.
Randomize
