well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
How many times have we said we'd stop taking Jell-O shots with strangers?
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
So, I never imagined myself puking on the side of the road at 10:30 this morning to Lynyrd Skynyrd but here I am.
I have only made 3 good decisions in my life and getting really stoned reenacting the Lion King with my cat in a lion mane hat is 2 of them.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
