He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
i wish there was a holiday celebrated with pizza eating
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
Trying to find a card for this engagement party. Can't find one that says "you met each other 5 months ago, cant wait to get the popcorn out and watch this one fall apart"
Nothing like waking up and watching Dr. Phil and masturbating. It's like a protein shake for the day.
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize