you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
WHY AM I CRAWLING IN OLDER MEN HOLY JESUS
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
Who was that dick in the suit telling us to stop drinking?
The priest.
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