did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
I woke up hungover and reached for a glass of water only to realize too late that it was vodka sprite with my splooge in it.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
Yes perhaps we are both wrong. And did you call me bj girl?
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Aw lol. Sounds like my masturbation injury last year
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
if any part of your body has ever entered my vagina you are fucking obligated to speak to me if i so desire
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This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
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