I took off my bra and money fell out...how crazy was I tonight?
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
I now officially know the distance between my two boobs is one twizzler.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
She told us she had powers and that eating tree bark cures the shits.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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