i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
They also submitted to my demands for pizza
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
My horoscope should say: you're an alcoholic, get help today, Pisces
Randomize
