Texts From Last Night

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  (915): View more from Texas

  I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic

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  (915): I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic http://tfl.nu/4fd0
  Replies (35) Good night (3496) Bad night (1547)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.

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  (214): i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends. http://tfl.nu/1l9v
  Replies (4) Good night (562) Bad night (4044)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'

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  (512): I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood' http://tfl.nu/xp6j
  Replies (14) Good night (1965) Bad night (6935)
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  (813): View more from Florida

  I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.

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  (813): I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month. http://tfl.nu/259p
  Replies (20) Good night (616) Bad night (5023)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.

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  (850): The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man. http://tfl.nu/ikii
  Replies (36) Good night (5027) Bad night (1223)
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job

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  (703): He had a seizure when i was giving him head. for a second i was thinking i was doing a spectacular job http://tfl.nu/934s
  Replies (14) Good night (1626) Bad night (7202)
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  (330): View more from Ohio

  I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times

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  (330): I'm sorry that spending new years with you was fucking my boyfriend in your bathroom multiple times http://tfl.nu/rqlm
  Replies (19) Good night (4235) Bad night (1515)
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  (818): View more from California

  The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.

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  (818): The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again. http://tfl.nu/z8ef
  Replies (11) Good night (4420) Bad night (878)
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  (763): View more from Minnesota

  I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"

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  (763): I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?" http://tfl.nu/jpwl
  Replies (7) Good night (2205) Bad night (1187)
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  (801): View more from Utah

  I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her.

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  (801): I feel more comfortable going down on her then actually kissing her. http://tfl.nu/f7hh
  Replies (19) Good night (1397) Bad night (3607)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight

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  (314): The sales associate looked at me funny for wobbling in the heels i was trying on until i told her i was trying to see how well i'd be able to drunk walk in these tonight http://tfl.nu/sdqv
  Replies (7) Good night (4068) Bad night (752)
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  (914): View more from New York

  What are you wearing tonight?

  (510): View more from California

  The colors of the winddddddd

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  (914): What are you wearing tonight? (510): The colors of the winddddddd http://tfl.nu/dt24
  Replies (7) Good night (3496) Bad night (534)
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  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.

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  (+44): We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate. http://tfl.nu/gets
  Replies (8) Good night (1833) Bad night (484)
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  (310): View more from California

  i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20

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  (310): i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20 http://tfl.nu/ve2e
  Replies (4) Good night (797) Bad night (321)
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  (561): View more from Florida

  am i new drunk or am i still drunk

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  (561): am i new drunk or am i still drunk http://tfl.nu/zvnj
  Replies (3) Good night (654) Bad night (230)

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