I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Also, if someone could cut me off before im rolling around the yard pantsless with a 40 year old lesbian that would be awesome.
All I remember is dance battling with a man named tom the entire time who kept buying me drinks so id say it was a success
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
so we just got back from swapping peoples patio furniture around to different patios. some people might like unexpected change. others might regret living on the ground floor.
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
