so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
i woke up to find out i shared my bed with a full, open can of natty light last night and didnt spill it. then i drank it for breakfast.
I just claimed my unemployment in Vegas. This seems wrong.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Wow, im gonna be a great doctor..."hi let me save your life but first check out this pic of me deep throating a handle of grey goose"
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize
