He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
Just chased the kids into the backyard with kitchen knives. Best. Babysitters. Ever.
We had sex in the ocean but the tide took our clothes away too. Its no fun walking back to the dorm wearing only a beach blanket between you.
Correct me if I'm wrong but the photo album titles "cause I've been drankin" and "baby jessica" should not belong to the same person.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
Then she looked me straight in the eyes and asked me if I missed my foreskin. Weirdest conversation ever.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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