Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I unwillingly was the ball between four hungry hippos last night. I thought the one chick was actually going to eat me
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
He is in my tree wearing full on scuba gear ... Get here asap.
Randomize
