dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
Hashbrowns don't come out your nose as easily as you would think
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
you set the microwave for an hour telling me that the done sound was your alarm.
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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