i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
How many Wendy's frosties do you think it would take to fill a bathtub?
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Can't believe we're making vacation plans with the guy we had a threesome with
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
So I might join you on the drunk train on the way to poor decisions.
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