Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
All I know is I was dancing to Shakira in his alley and I think rubbing my junk on his car door.
Did I really drink that whole bottle of Jack Daniels last night?
Heroically.
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
We had sex six times. In a span of 8 hours. Confirmation I don't need to go to the gym.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
