You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Nothing says true friendship like 2 people bonding over potentially having AIDS.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I just feel like Im gonna be remembered as that one RA guy that used to sell weed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
Champagne is a vitamin, right?
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
she cried into her fur with two handfuls of money- she was the physical manifestation of white girl problems
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
I caved man... I fucked her so vigorously, desperately trying to correct her wonky eye. My determination was relentless.
You are a terrible person.
I just try to be optimistic...
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
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