what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
