too bad you live with your parents still
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
I will refer to it as the penis of glory... he fucked me for 3 and a half hours - and all he needed was a 5 minute power nap in the middle (which he took WHILE INSIDE ME). I plan on staying with him forever
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
My liver is preforming stress tests.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
There is sex in the air. Be careful where you walk.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
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