Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I'm love that we're talking about a possible 3rd 3some, and that you're going to be a dad.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
I feel like I ran a fucking marathon on my knees last night and there are bruises to prove it.
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
Just talked a homeless guy out of suicide. Was rewarded with a garbage bag full of mountain dew bottles and zannies. Im such a good person
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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