mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I'm sad about how hungover I'm gonna feel tomorrow.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
I never thought I'd be judging my neighbors sex lives before age 30 but here we are
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