I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
I am 100% positive that I have seen a porno that was shot in this bar.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
Our fake lesbian relationship is better than her real relationship. Bitch be jealous
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