ya dads aren't the best wingmen
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
You told the cop at mobil to keep it real and look both ways before crossing the street.
Idk. Last year there was an ice luge, glow in the dark jungle juice, and lots of naked people. I feel like I'll get pregnant just thinking about going to that party.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
it's not rock bottom until you fall down an escalator on the way home from a hookup and have to have you dad come pick your drunkass up at 3am. Adulthood.
how does that bad decision feel?
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
