3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
wait a second... your telling me you want me to take you to the bank at 10 on a tuesday so you can buy a blow up pool and fill it with beer?
yes... and buy you lunch
I don't want to talk. I just want to motorboat those tits
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
I don't even think NICOLE made a fool of herself last night...
your aware she lit herself on fire, right?
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Randomize
