If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize
