i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
Woke up shivering behind the titty bar, With the worst leg cramps. I'm like a poster boy for responsibility.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
Hope you had your fill for the summer my friend, because all the cleavage has been put away for the winter. Fear not; it blooms again in May.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
I don't remember anything beyond the drinking game but I woke up in my own pee this morning so I'm just gonna go out on a limb and say I overdid it.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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