When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
She stopped me mid sex to ask if she could finish my ramen, I've found the one.
we're gonna read the declaration of independence and do a shot for every word he doesn't understand.
Thinking and hoping ice cream is the answer to my problems
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
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