Assholes at mcdonalds drive through wouldn't serve us last night even though we said we were on small motorcycles that were to small for them to see and weren't heavy enough for the sensors. We made noises and everything.
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
Randomize