Those strippers last night smelled great. It was the perfect mixture of vanilla and daddy issues.
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Right before we were going to have sex he said it was his "lucky condom" I don't know if that means its used or what.. But I'm freaking out either way.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I still have your make up all over the inside of my thighs from the face sitting. Free tonight?
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
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