I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
The 9th floor RA wants to know why we stacked 21 cinder blocks in the shower, and I can't remember. Do you?
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
I'm seeing how long I can hold this wine in my mouth. I have so many adventures! I'm like Teddy Ruxpin!
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Randomize
