There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
I'm having a chugging contest on the streetcar. The driver is judging.
Plus someone just passed me a joint through the window. BEST STREETCAR RIDE EVER
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
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