WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
Well im sitting on a futon on a porch at 1:30 in the afternoon drinking boxed wine out of a pint glass next to a chick with a homemade neckbrace. What do you think?
How external is "for external use only"?
I texted him that I wanted to be more than fuck buddies so when I came over he gave me a punch card. He takes me I dinner every 10 fucks.
All the party invite said was a date and "21 to drink, 18ish to sleep over"
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
You're up at 3AM, right? I have a very important question.
You know the Wendy's on route 6, by Kohls? Do you know if it has a drive through?
Yes it does.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize
