i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
My dad just told me he used to masturbate to cat woman...he then proceeded to beat my brother in beer pong and wont let me play...
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I just showed my tits to my brother on chatroulette. Could my life get any worse?
My mom just walked in on me and my girlfriend about to have sex. All she said was "You're lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground.."
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Why have her stay eight hours when I only last eight minutes?
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
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