There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
One of my residents in my hall just found my positive pregnancy test from last year I hid behind the fridge, I'm just going to tell them it was for a science project.
oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I don't think she considers it a date unless she publicly urinates
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
His mom showed up at my doorstep, begging me to take him back for him
Where do you find these people?
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
