dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
Received world's greatest BJ while in a planetarium. Was seeing stars while seeing stars.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
I can't decide if I'm depressed or if this is just what life without a bidet feels like.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
So chicken strips and confidence do not you make you sober.
Randomize
