Dude love is like an itch. You fuckin scratch it, then it itches more, then you scratch it and it itches more, and before you know it, there is semen everywhere.
you are insane
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
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This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
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You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
WHY IS HE GONE WHEN I ACTUALLY HAVE THE AMOUT OF ESTROGEN TO HUMP A SQUIRREL?!?!
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
I got St Patrick's Day drunk on Friday and apparently ordered a Total Gym in the middle of the night
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