Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me the "I've pictured you while jerkin off" look
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
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