Hey man sorry I got all grabby
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
He passed out mid-signature
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
I haven't seen her in probably 3 months and when she showed up wasted to my house she promptly pulled out her tit
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
