The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
So, someone in Olympia stole my credit card # last week and bought a platypus vibrator with it. That’s it.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
So then you challenged the bartender to an arm wrestling contest for a free bottle of vodka
Sweet. Did I win?
Youre hungover arent you?
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
Dad literally changed the channel from an episode of Big Bang Theory to another episode of Big Bang Theory. That's why I hate this show.
Randomize
